You’ve heard it a hundred times: post consistently, give value, show up. So you do. You post. You show up. You give all the value.

And your DMs stay quiet.

If that’s where you are right now, I want to tell you something important: it’s not that your content is bad. It’s not that nobody wants what you offer. It’s that your posts are probably written for everyone, and when you write for everyone, you’re really writing for no one.

Let me break this down.

The Myth of ‘More Value’

There’s this idea floating around that if your DMs are quiet, you just need better content. More tips. More how-tos. More value-packed carousels.

But here’s the thing, you can have incredible posts, ones that other people tell you are gold, and still not get a single DM. I’ve seen it happen. I worked with a woman who had 15,000 followers, showed up consistently, and still couldn’t convert. When we dug into her content, the problem wasn’t the quality. It was who she was writing to: everyone.

And when you’re writing to everyone, you end up speaking to no one.

The Shift: Name Your Person

The fix isn’t complicated, and that’s the part that’ll surprise you.

You need to give your ideal person a name.

Sounds too simple, right? Stay with me.

When you have a name; Maya, Kira, Tori, whatever fits, everything about the way you create content changes. Instead of opening your notes app and staring at a blank screen wondering ‘what the hell do I even say today,’ you sit down and think: what is Maya struggling with right now? What does she wish someone would just say out loud?

You stop writing AT your audience and start writing TO her. And the difference between those two things is the difference between crickets and conversations.

I Had to Learn This the Hard Way

For a long time, I was the self-described ‘everything coach.’ Offer creation, market research, messaging, sales strategy, time management, I taught all of it. And I genuinely thought that was a strength.

Then I had a conversation with Cassie, Copywriting Mama, shout out to her because she completely transformed my business and she basically looked at everything I was doing and said: ‘Liz, you do messaging and sales. That’s your thing. Why won’t you just say that?’

And I dug my heels in. Hard. I didn’t want to narrow it down. I didn’t want to be ‘just’ the messaging and sales person. But here’s what happened when I finally gave in and stepped into that lane: I felt this huge weight lift.

My content got cleaner.

My DMs got more intentional.

I stopped talking to the masses and started talking to my one person, the woman who’s doing all the things and still can’t figure out why her content isn’t converting.

That’s who I write to now. And it changed everything.

What Happens When You Actually Do This

When you name your person and start writing for her specifically, a few things happen:

• Your content starts to feel less like you’re performing and more like you’re just talking
• The right people read it and think ‘she gets me’ — and slide into your DMs
• The wrong people scroll past, which is actually what you want
• You stop reinventing the wheel every time you sit down to post

That 15K-follower client? Once we named her person and rebuilt her content around that one specific woman, her DMs opened up. Not because she was posting more because she was finally posting for someone.

Your Homework (Yes, Right Now)

Here’s what I want you to do after reading this:

• Give her a name. Pick anything that feels real; a friend’s name, a name you love, whatever makes her feel like a person.
• Find a picture that looks like her. A stock photo, a friend’s pic, anything that gives her a face so she feels real when you sit down to write.
• Write your next piece of content for her. Record your voice, transcribe it, and turn it into a post. Talk to her like she’s sitting across from you at a coffee shop. Don’t overthink the structure, just talk to her.

If you’re not sure who she is yet, that’s exactly what the Spark the Conversation Challenge is for. In just 20 minutes a day for five days, you’ll figure out your person’s exact language, phrases, pain points, and what she’s actually typing into Google at 11pm.

Your people are out there. They just need to hear the right thing from you first.

👉 Join the free Spark the Conversation Challenge here: lisbethgraham.co/freechallenge

👉 Ready to go deeper? Learn about The Phoenix Experience: lisbethgraham.co/thephoenixexperience

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your path. — Proverbs 3:5–6